I can't do it

You can't do it? Let me tell you- you can. I believe in you, I truly do. You my friend, are a beautiful and wonderful human being, and I know you can do it. Whatever it is; telling your parents you're gay, climbing Snowdon, sitting yourself up in bed, or even simply carrying on to the next moment of your day. I know it seems impossible, like you're a the bottom of this scary dark pit where nobody understands what you're going through. Take my hand, go on, take it. Trust me, because I believe you have so much potential. You could be a doctor, a solider, an astronaut, a mother, father, bricklayer, friend, vegetarian, advocate, whatever you want to be. The only thing holding you back is yourself. You've had a rough start? So did a lot of people. You have low self esteem? Most of the teenage population does these days!

I'm not telling you your problems are invalid, and I know there are so many of you out there who are bruised and broken and hurting. Those of you who feel you have nothing left, nothing to give, no redeeming factor. Some of you will be feeling suicidal. Some of you will, like me, want to curl up into a ball and sleep until the pain goes away. Depression, anxiety, self harm, eating disorders; they've taken our generation by storm, and that's not okay. I love you guys, I love our world and I love young people. We are the future doctors, politicians, teachers and parents. We will be running this country before we know it. And I refuse to believe this is a lost generation, despite the media's constant slander. Crime, drugs, gangs, teen pregnancy, alcoholism and anti-social behaviour; these are just a few of the paths that some teens have no choice but to walk down. 

Do you know why they have no choice? Because we've already condemned them. That aggressive looking lad walking around the estate in a tracksuit, holding a can of cheap larger, unemployed and miserable; you've judged him already. Sentenced him to a life of menial work, if any, living off benefits with his pregnant teen girlfriend in a shoddy council flat. Surely we want more for these kids. And that's all they are; children. The minute anyone turns 18, they are forgotten by the system, and cast out to fend for themselves. They have no future, no hope.

You might be a middle class girl with her brand new iPhone, a loving mum and a doting daddy, but let me tell you, you're not free from this. Have you ever felt hollow and aching and empty inside? Anxious? Have you dieted to look thinner, or spent hours before school meticulously applying make up so that someone will notice you? Have you been hurt by the boy of your dreams, or maybe your best friend has stabbed you in the back yet again? Are you happy? Truly happy. Do you have hope for your future?

And maybe, just maybe, you think your life can't get any better. Everything has gone to plan, you're happy and content and the future looks bright for you. If that's you, then I am very happy for you, but the sad reality for many young people throughout our nation, they feel lost, alone, unwanted, judged and stereotyped. Society has painted all young people, especially those who've had a less than wonderful start to life, with the same brush of judgement and cynicism. We are the children of a conservative generation, a generation that opposes change, rejects redesign and protests against progress, (this is starting to sound awfully Lib-Dem) and it is up to us to take a stand for our future.

I'm here to tell you that there is hope. Hope lives within each and every one of us, and we can choose to raise and kindle that flame of hope, or try to stamp it out with bitter thoughts and angry deeds. Hope is the refusal to accept a situation as it is, and I know that there are many out there working to bring hope and love and joy into the lives of young people. In August last year I attended a Christian festival called 'Soul Survivor.' Whilst I was there, I heard a man named Patrick Regan speak on the subject of hope. It inspired me and really challenged the way I had been thinking for the past few years. 

Patrick is the CEO of a Christian charity called XLP (short for the excel project.) XLP works with young people and their families in schools and estates across central London, running after-school and lunchtime clubs, youth groups and taking their two youth activity buses around the different estates. Today, on a day-to-day basis, XLP has projects dealing with a wide variety of issues including drugs awareness, anger management and violence, poverty and fairtrade, prejudice and racism, sex and relationships, and image and identity. These guys provide hope to those kids who have never been given a chance to change their destiny. They do many other things including an arts showcase where young people are given the freedom to express themselves and the issues that concern them. Each year XLP takes on and trains up gap-year and degree students to work with these teenagers, sharing with them the hope they have found through faith. 

In October 2012, I journeyed down to London to the XLP open day. I was still able to walk a little but mostly I had to use my wheelchair. I even had to negotiate the tube in my chair- scary stuff! But I made it to the headquarters, eventually, and met Patrick and the team, heard them talk about the charity some more, about the gap-year course and everything else. I was so excited, I couldn't wait to finish my A-levels and apply for the gap year; I got on really well with the other members of staff and felt really peaceful and comfortable in London. I knew I could bring hope to the lives of these youngsters, and I felt a real passion burning in me for the estates of London.

However, as my illness have gotten worse, I've prayed and thought a lot about my future, my own hope. M.E. can last months, or it can last years. The severity can fluctuate massively, and I never really know what's around the corner. I've been bed-bound for almost two months now, and I feel like I'm losing my grip on my future. My passion is young people, seeing lives and hearts change, and I know that at the moment, I cannot do this as fully as I'd like to. I keep praying, and I give some of my income towards the charities work. I wish I could do more and I still believe and hope that one day I will achieve my dreams through XLP.

So, if you're still here and listening, well done! I believe in you, because I know that if you can believe in yourself, you can take on anything this world throws at you. It might seem impossible at times, and I know all too well the temptation to give up, but I promise you this; if you keep at it, you'll get there. So spread your wings, take a chance, do that thing you keep meaning to do, but haven't yet because you're not sure how it'll turn out. Laugh often, love deeply, cry when you need to, and have hope, because life is what you make of it, and I know you're a diamond in the rough.

Love, Alice.© Alice Daley 2013